


The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

by PinkPandorafrog



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M, SO MUCH FLUFF, holiday fluff, winter fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-29
Updated: 2015-12-22
Packaged: 2018-05-04 00:47:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 21,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5313704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PinkPandorafrog/pseuds/PinkPandorafrog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of winter/holiday drabbles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Darcy/Steve, sledding

 Darcy opened her eyes. Well, she was awake. She was awake... For a reason. What could that be? There was still a warm body nestled down on either side of her, so that wasn't it. The morning light was starting to come in through the window, but the heavy curtains managed to block out most of it if not the draft, so that wasn't it. It was quiet. Maybe that was it. It was quiet?

She pushed her blanket back, kicking it down to the foot of the bed, and immediately regretted it. It was _freezing_. _Someone_ had probably turned the heat down because his super soldier metabolism left him toasty warm and had forgotten that Darcy liked things like circulation and being able to feel her toes.

She scooted down to the end of the bed and got to her feet. Neither body left on the bed stirred, and she looked at them a little reproachfully as she hurried to yank on about five layers of clothes. Okay, maybe not _five_.

The door was left open a crack overnight, and she eased it the rest of the way open and moved out onto the smooth wooden floor in the hall. She automatically avoided the creaky spots as she walked down towards the next bedroom. The door was open, that wasn't a surprise, but a cursory check showed that the occupant _wasn't_ still in bed. So that was why she'd woken up.

Darcy made her way down the stairs. He wasn't in the kitchen, he wasn't watching TV in the living room. Resting her hands on her hips, she frowned as she looked around the room. The alarms hadn't gone off, so he had to be _somewhere_. Still, it was hard not to be a little worried as she tried to think where he could be. Outside? Maybe?

A layer of fresh snow had fallen during the night. Sure enough, there were little footprints leading across the dust on the front porch. “You'd better be wearing your jacket.”

Darcy grabbed her own coat and shoved her feet into her boots before pulling the door open. She made sure to shut it quietly behind her. Her boots crunched softly against the snow as she walked across the porch and out into the yard. It had stopped snowing that morning sometime, so it was easy enough to follow the path that led around the side of the house and back towards the hill. There was a single line dragged through the snow beside the footprints, and Darcy's eyebrows went up as she saw it.

He _was_ wearing his jacket. Not a hat or mittens, though. Luckily they were still shoved in the front pockets of Darcy's jacket. There was a little hill out behind the house, and he was speeding down it on... Something. “Michael Steven Lewis, you get your little butt over here right now.” She managed the Mom-voice pretty well even though it was pre-coffee.

The little boy looked up at her, an unabashed smile on his face. He abandoned whatever he'd been sitting on and walked through the snow towards her, slipping a little as he made his way across the yard.

Darcy pulled the hat out of her pocket and jammed it down on his head before handing her the mittens. “What are you sledding on, little man?”

“Daddy's shield.” After he worked the mittens onto his hands, he turned around and went back towards where he'd left his makeshift sled. Sure enough, he pulled the edge of Steve's blue and red shield up out of the snow and started dragging it back up the hill.

“Well, that answers _that_ question.” She definitely wasn't buying his shit about not being able to carry firewood again.

Someone was moving through the snow behind her, and she turned to look over her shoulder. Steve was walking towards her, having a much easier time of making his way through the snow than she had. “Did you know about this?”

“Which, the sledding or that he can lift my shield?” Steve stopped behind her, sliding his arms around her waist and pulling her back against him.

“Either. Or both.” She laced her fingers between his.

He _didn't_ answer, which was answer enough. “Clint's making breakfast.”

Darcy sighed, leaning her head back against his chest. She felt him rest his chin gently on top of her head. “Coffee?”

“Of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With bonus Clint.


	2. Darcy/Thor, mistletoe

Darcy rested her hands on her hips, staring up at the top of the doorway that led from the lounge out to where everyone lived. None of the nearby furniture was light or small enough to be able to pull close and use for a step stool, and of course Tony wouldn’t have any  _actual_ step stools  _anywhere in the fucking tower_.

Someone was coming down the hall towards her, though, and Darcy broke into a smile as she saw who it was. “Thor, can you be tall for me for a second?”

“Of course.” His long strides quickly carried him up to where she was standing just on the other side of the doorway. He came to a stop, an easy smile on his face. “What do you need?”

She held up the tiny plastic sprig of mistletoe that she’d been clutching in her hand. “I need this up _there_.” She pointed up at the top of the doorway.

Thor followed the line of her pointing finger, then glanced down at the green and white plastic in his hand. “This is one of your holiday decorations?”

“Yeah.” She nodded. “I’ll get you a piece of tape if you want, that should hold it.”

The unexpected bonus of getting Thor to help was watching the play of muscles in his back as he reached up above his head with the little decoration. Even through his t-shirt it was pretty spectacular. Darcy only let herself stare for a second before turning to grab a piece of tape off of the dispenser.

She gave it to him and the second arm joined the first up above his head. Not  _quite_  high enough to show any skin between the hem of his t-shirt and his jeans, but it was still pretty nice to look at. “Thanks.”

“Of course,” he said again with another warm smile.

“And this is for…” She stepped forward until she was standing in the doorway with him, and reached up behind his neck to gently tug his head down. He looked a little bemused, but he let her, and as soon as she could reach all stretched up on her toes, Darcy brushed her lips against his cheek. “There.”

He looked at her for a moment as she let him go and dropped back to stand flat on her heels again. “This small plastic plant is for kisses?”

“Basically, yeah. It’s a tradition.” She shrugged a little. “Some people think it’s an excuse to make out with anyone in the room, but I like that it encourages closeness between people. Sometimes we can take our friends for granted, you know, and it reminds us that hey, they’re there, and we love them.”

His arm came around her shoulder, pulling her close against his side. “I like this tradition. The people of Midgard are often very busy. What is it called?”

Darcy let her head rest against the side of Thor’s chest. “It’s called mistletoe. There’s a real plant named mistletoe, of course, but then you have dead plants all over the place, and it’s poisonous.” She made a face. She didn’t want poisonous plants anywhere her cat might get at them.

“A poisonous plant is a symbol of affection in this realm.” Thor arched an eyebrow as he looked down at her. It wasn’t a question, more an amused observation.

She shrugged. “Yeah. That part I don’t get. Maybe people used to smoke it and it would make them all hot and bothered.” She made to move away from him, but his arm tightened around her.

“Hold a moment.”

“Yeah.” She looked up at him again, eyebrows raised a little in question.

He leaned down until his lips touched against hers. It was gentle at first, but then decidedly not as he turned towards her and pressed into her until she was bent backwards a little against his arm.

When he straightened away, he winked at her before stepping out of the doorway to continue on to wherever he’d been headed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Don't smoke mistletoe)


	3. Darcy/Bucky, Secret Santa

 Darcy looked up from her tablet to where Bucky was sitting on the other end of the couch reading an actual book. Paper pages and everything. “If you were a super soldier who was born in 1918 what would you want for Christmas?”

Bucky looked up from his book, turning so that his blue eyes coming to rest on her. “I was born in 1917,” he said after a second.

“Yeah, I know. But Steve was born in 1918. You remember Steve? Big guy, blond hair, used to be a tiny asthmatic? Your best friend in the history of ever? Ringing any bells?” Her eyebrows raised as she looked across at him. He just gave her a look. “Besides, I already know what I'm getting you. No, I got him for Secret Santa, and I have no idea what the hell to get him.”

Bucky nodded, then gave a one-armed shrug. “Steve always was a bitch to get things for. You can't get him things he needs because of his fucking pride.”

“Yeah.” Not that he probably really _needed_ anything anymore. All of his tech shit and suit was provided for him, and unless he needed a new blender or something, Darcy really had no idea what would be on his list of shit he had to have. “Obviously the art thing, but that seems a little _too_ obvious. He's into sci-fi, isn't he?”

Bucky appeared to think for a minute, then nodded. “Yeah. He likes one of the Star ones that you're always watching.”

“One of the Star ones?” Darcy stared at him for a long moment. “Star Trek? Star Wars?”

“I don't know.” Bucky frowned, shaking his head. “The one that has an idealized future human society.”

Probably Star Trek, then. Probably. “Have you even seen either of them yet?” When he shook his head, she narrowed her eyes. “Possibly changing what I'm getting you.”

He stilled. She knew that movement, that meant he might be getting ready to pounce. “What are you getting me?”

“I'm not telling. Can't make me.” Darcy was _already_ getting off the couch, or he would have grabbed her as he lunged across at her. He moved _fast_.

She didn't get very far, though, before his hand slipped around the front of her waist, pulling her back against him. She shrieked with laughter as she landed on his thighs with a heavy flop that didn't seem to phase him at all. “What are you getting me?” he asked again, his arms locked around her midsection.

“Nat!” Darcy shouted at the redhead as she passed on her way into the kitchen. “Help!”

Nat raised an eyebrow and smirked. “Oh no. I'm not getting in the middle of that.” She shook her head as she walked right on past them.

“Bucky!” Darcy shrieked as his fingers skittered against her ribs, trying to squirm away as he tickled her. “I'll tell!”

He stopped, his arms falling slack against her midsection. His nose buried in the hair at the back of her head. “What is it?”

She waited until he'd completely relaxed, then braced her feet hard against the floor and shot to her feet. Again she only got a couple of steps before he snagged her, this time lifting her effortlessly up off the ground. She squirmed against him, but there was no getting anywhere. “Fine, I'll give you a hint. It involves me wearing something specific doing interesting things with different parts of my body.”

Bucky went completely still again before he started moving. He was heading for the hall, holding her easily up against the front of his body. “Something tells me the rest of this conversation should be private.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> She's TOTALLY talking about playing video games together in matching shirts. Obviously.


	4. Darcy/Sam, mistletoe

 Darcy narrowed her eyes as she stared up at the little piece of green-and-white plastic that was stapled? Taped? Glued? Something to the top of Jane's lab door. “Jane?”

“Yeah?” Jane sort of waved at her from where she was squinting at her monitor without even looking up.

“Why do you have mistletoe in your doorway?” Darcy's hands moved to rest on the fuzzy sweater covering her hips as she looked across the lab to her friend.

Jane went pink. She still didn't look up, instead she seemed to get _more_ engrossed in whatever she was doing. “Christmas decoration.” She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, it was a nervous habit.

“No, the Christmas tree Bruce brought over made out of test tubes is a Christmas decoration. _This_ is...” The color on Jane's face seemed to intensify, and Darcy's eyes flew wide open. “Oh my god. You are _not_ using this as an excuse to make out with Dr. Fluffy, are you?” No answer. “You totally are. That's the best thing I've ever heard. Hey, has Tony heard about this yet?”

That _did_ make Jane look up and she stared at Darcy for a second. “You wouldn't.”

“He hasn't?” A grin slowly spread across Darcy's face. “What are the chances I tell Steve and he lets it drop to Tony as pillow talk?” Because Tony had been trying to set Jane and Bruce up _forever_.

Before Jane could get a chance to answer, though, a light touch against Darcy's shoulder made her squeak and whirl around, her hand going up to her chest. “Oh my _god_ , Sam! Warn a girl!”

He gave her one of the grins that never failed to make her knees a little weak. “Sorry, Darcy. I was looking for you, J said I'd find you here.”

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, her hand dropping down to her side. “Sure. Yeah. What's up?”

“I wanted to ask you about those harness liners you got for me last time. I'm down to my last set, and the ones that are laying around here just aren't as comfortable, they really cut into my shoulders.”

“Sure, of course. Just let me...” Darcy fished her phone out of the pocket of her jeans and opened up a memo. _Harness liners for Sam_. “There. The next time I'm actually at my computer I'll get those ordered. Anything else you need?”

“I think that'll do me.” He stood there for a second, just looking down at her. “I guess I should-”

“Hey, Sam,” came Jane's voice from across the lab. Darcy closed her eyes. She _knew_ that tone. She absolutely knew that tone. That was the tone that had introduced Thor to body shots. Off of Darcy, of course. “Look up.”

The immediacy had Darcy's eyes flying open again. She'd expected some sort of payback from the teasing of course, but had thought it would happen in some sort of future tense, like Jane pointing out that Darcy had no plans for that evening. This, however...

Sam looked up at the little green leaves, and an eyebrow arched, his lips curving up into a smile again. He licked his lips, and Darcy couldn't _not_ watch the motion of his tongue. His hands came out to rest on either side of her waist and he slowly bent down. He was giving her time to pull away, but all Darcy could do was stare up at him, eyes wide, as he got closer and closer.

His lips touched against hers once, just the briefest of contact, before returning for something altogether _filthier_ , all tongue and hands moving desperately over each other's backs.

Eventually he pulled away. His eyes flicked over to Jane before focusing on Darcy again. “I'll see you later.” That sounded a lot like a promise.

Darcy unashamedly watched him walk back down the hall, because _that_ was a sight worth seeing. When he was out of view, she looked back into the lab to see Jane wearing the biggest shit-eating grin. “I guess Steve doesn't know about that, huh.”

Darcy narrowed her eyes at her best friend. “We'll call this round a draw.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Steve totally ships it.


	5. Jane/Bucky, sledding

 “Jane.”

The quiet voice forced her into wakefulness. She sat straight up, peering around to try and place herself. She was in the lab, her lab, and she'd fallen asleep with her head pillowed on her arms. “I'm up.”

A gentle hand was rubbing small circles between her shoulders. “We've got about 10 minutes before it's time to leave.”

“Uh huh.” Jane peered down at the sprawl of paper in front of her. Tony always bitched at her about still using paper instead of going green and keeping everything electronic, but she found that actually writing things down and moving pages around helped her process and keep track of everything better. “Where are we going?”

“Sledding.” Lips moved across the back of her neck where her ponytail left the skin exposed.

Oh, that was right. Darcy insisted on setting up group activities for everyone so they could just get out of the Tower and stop being superheroes and scientists for a while and just be people. Jane sighed. “Okay. I guess I need to get changed.” Because she was going to get wet, and no matter how comfortable jeans were to work in, they weren't exactly pleasant when they were soggy.

She got to her feet and turned around to see James standing behind her, a steaming cup of coffee in one hand, her weather-proof pants- a leftover from working in Norway- in the other. He held both out to her, and she stared at them for a moment before looking up into his face. “What would I do without you?”

“Be wet and tired?” A smile moved across his face.

She braced her hand on his shoulder and went up on her tiptoes to give him a quick kiss. “That's true. Are you sure you want to go?”

James reached around her to drape the pants over the back of her chair and set the mug of hot coffee on the table. Empty, his hands met at the small of her back, holding her loosely. “We're takin' the Quinjet up to the mountain, won't be anyone else there.”

“Oh, good. Oh.” Her eyes widened as she remembered something. “I have something for you. I got a while ago, and it's been sitting down here in my desk, but...” She slipped away from him and went over to her desk, bending down to open the bottom drawer. She was pretty sure that this was where she'd left it. Sure enough, the bag was still sitting there. She grabbed it and pushed the drawer shut, moving back to where James was waiting for her. “Here.”

He looked a question at her as he took the bag, then opened it up and peered inside. “What's this?”

“It's like an extra warm thermal shirt, I guess. We wore them when we were working up in the Arctic last fall. I know your shoulder gets achy when you get too cold, so I just thought...” She trailed off and gestured to the shirt. “That should help, I hope.”

His eyes widened a little in surprise, and a small smile moved across his face. “Thank you.” He immediately reached behind his head and grabbed the back of his shirt, pulling it off in one smooth motion. Jane couldn't help but stare a little at his broad chest and the defined abs that led down to the waist of his dark pants.

She realized she'd been staring when he cleared his throat, and he set the bag down on the chair, stepping forward to slide his hands around her waist again. “We don't have to go, you know.”

She rested her hands against the warmth of his bare chest. It was tempting, oh so tempting. But she shook her head. “We do. I'm pretty sure if we miss one more of these things because we're having sex Darcy is going to do something drastic.”

“It might be worth it.” James leaned down brushing a series of feather-light kisses down the side of her neck.

She let out a soft sigh, giving in for a moment. “No,” she said, fairly unconvincingly, pushing at his chest a little. He was too solid to really move, but he did back off a bit until he he was looking down at her again, heat and mischief in his eyes. “We should go. But...” She looked down for a second before meeting his eyes again. “I'll probably need help warming up when we get back.”

His smile spread into a broad grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know, WINK.


	6. Darcy/Bucky, mistletoe

 Darcy put her hands on her hips, surveying the room. Tim was no Steve, you know, big Steve, but he was definitely taller than her. He'd helped hang everything in the places Darcy couldn't reach, which was _way_ better than perching up on her rickety-ass chair to get everything up. “Thanks, Tim.”

He nodded from over by the door where he'd just finished hanging the last of the garland Darcy had made out of red and green paper. “Sure. You forgot something, though.” His lips were twitching under his mustache like he was trying not to smile.

“Oh, and what's that?”

He reached into the pocket of his uniform and pulled out a slightly crumpled bit of greenery. Her eyes narrowed as she looked across at him. “That's not...”

“Mistletoe? Sure is. There's a big bunch of it out on that oak out there, I pulled some down.” Which meant there'd be more ready if it happened to disappear, and Darcy was pretty sure that Tim would ensure she had a fresh supply.

She raised her eyebrows and tilted her head down as she looked across at him. “This isn't another ploy to hook me up with one of your boys, is it?”

His mouth curved up into a full-on unrepentant grin. “Would I do that?”

“Uh, yeah you would.” Sighing, she shook head and could only watch as he reached up and hung it from the doorjamb that led in from the tiny foyer into the main part of the basement. Well, that would be easy enough to avoid, Darcy hardly went over there anyway. Peggy and Steve, though, that might be an idea...

But Tim wasn't done. He pulled out another slightly battered sprig of greenery and walked through to hang it from the beam nearly in the center of the room. Okay, that would take some doing to avoid. It was right beside the fucking table. “Don't worry, if it falls down I can get some more.”

“Uh huh.” She sighed again and walked over to him, bracing her hand on his shoulder so she could reach up on her toes and press a kiss to his cheek. “You're so thoughtful.”

His eyes fucking twinkled. “Any time.”

It wasn't that much later when the aforementioned “boys” started heading down the stairs and filing into her little hideyhole. Darcy smiled to see them, they really did make her stay here less painful.

There were exclamations of how great everything looked as drinks were passed around and cards started being shuffled. Darcy didn't really feel like playing, but it was nice just to have the company as the Howling Commandos, minus Steve, who was probably debriefing or whatever, filled the room with laughter and chatter.

Peggy and Steve came in together a little bit later, and there was a lot of blushing (more from Steve than Peggy) as she rolled her eyes, pronounced them all children, and reached up to plant a slightly lingering kiss against Steve's cheek.

A hand against her back pulled Darcy's attention away from where Peggy was protesting just a bit _too_ much that cheek-kissing did too count. She turned and looked over her shoulder to see Bucky standing there, a big grin on his face.

“Yeah?” she asked, unable to keep from smiling as she looked up at him.

He held his drink out and James, the one who actually went by James, took it from him. And then he took Darcy in his arms, dipped her back a little, and kissed her. And it wasn't just some gentle peck either, no, it was _dirty_ with tongue and teeth and the little noise Darcy made when he drew her lower lip into his mouth.

And then he set her back on her feet. Darcy pressed her lips together and stared up at him as he winked at her. “Mistletoe.” He pointed carelessly at the little green plant Tim had hung there earlier.

And of course the rest of the guys took it well, with whistles and back-slapping. Even Peggy's lips were twitching a little, although she tried to look disapproving.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have this persistent AU/plotbunny where Darcy gets sucked into the past and ends up spending the duration of the war in a basement passing along "intelligence" she learned during high school history, and the Howling Commandos (and Peggy) keep her company.


	7. Darcy/Daisy/Fitz, gifts

 “Darcy!” Leo was slightly breathless as his Scottish accent filled Darcy's ear. “I need help.”

Her eyes widened a little in concern as she looked up from her monitor, not really focusing her sight on anything. “Everything okay?”

“I don't know what to get Daisy for Christmas.” And he was _panicked_ about it.

Her eyes narrowed as she listened to what was going on. There was a lot of background noise on his end of the conversation, the general buzz of people talking punctuated every so often by a shriek. “Are you in a mall?” That was a bad idea. There was a reason Darcy did all of her shopping online during the holidays.

“Where else would I get a gift? Of course I'm in a mall.” He sounded slightly impatient.

She gave her monitor a pointed look for lack of Leo actually being able to see her. “I can just go if you're just going to snap at me.”

“Right, sorry.” He took in a deep breath that came out on a long sigh. “Just I'm worried, I don't know what to get her. I don't want to get the wrong thing.”

“Judging by the look on her face whenever she was around you when you guys were here, I don't think you have to worry about that. You could get her, like, a hand towel, and she'd be all, 'Oh, Fitz, this is the best thing ever!'” And why Daisy called him Fitz when they were in a relationship was beyond her, but whatever. They were happy with it.

“I'm not getting her a hand towel.” The impatience was back. “I want to get her something nice.”

“Girls like shiny things. Get her something shiny.” There was silence from the other end of the phone. “It doesn't necessarily have to be jewelry, you know. Lots of things are shiny. Guns are shiny, phones are shiny. Hey. Wait a second.” She gave her monitor a long look, eyebrows raised. “You _make_ shiny things. Are you seriously in a mall right now?”

Another second of silence, but this time he broke it by asking, “What do you mean, make something?”

“There are reasons we handmake things for the people we care about. One, it shows we took extra time and effort to do something unique just for them. Two, we get to make something that we know is relevant to their interests.”

“Like what?”

Darcy gave her monitor another look. “I don't know, you're the one who's around her all the time. And you're the one with the genius engineering brain.” She sighed. “I don't know, make a better vibrator.

The answer was immediate. “No, I...” Leo trailed off into nothing. “Really?” Like he was actually considering it.

“Yeah. And then you get to share her Christmas present, which is win for both of you.” She looked down at yesterday's red-and-green manicure. “And then maybe you can bring it with you the next time you guys are in New York, just a suggestion.”

“Well, I guess I know what to get you, then,” came the dry reply. He was moving, and in just a second it was a lot quieter on the other end of the phone. He'd probably stepped outside. Hopefully he was actually going to take her advice.

“I like that idea!” Darcy gave her monitor a grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Handmade gifts are the best.


	8. Darcy/Bruce, ice skating

He’d clipped his glorious, fluffy hair short and wore a perpetual three-day’s scruff, but there was really no mistaking who the new biology teacher was. Not that anyone else seemed to realize. Whatever. Darcy was good at keeping secrets.

He tended to keep to himself, and Darcy was fairly certain she knew the reason for  _that_ , too, but again… Secrets were kinda her thing. Still, she made sure that he had at least some social contact in his life, stopping by his classroom during breaks and after school just to say hi.

She knocked briefly on the open door to his lab and stepped inside when he looked up from where he was sitting at his desk. “Hey, Bill.” He said his name was Bill Reynolds. Whatever.

“Hi, Darcy.” Bill scrubbed his hand over his chin, fingers rasping across the bristles, before giving her a carefully guarded smile.

She walked across the lab, heels clicking on the hard floor, and sat down on the edge of his wooden desk where there was just enough for her butt. “You gonna do the ice skating thing this weekend?” Some of the faculty had planned a group trip to the ice rink in the next town over. She figured she already knew the answer, but it was a way to make conversation.

He shook his head. “No, I don’t ice skate. Bad sense of balance.”

“Too bad.” She looked down at him, studying him. He wasn’t as closed off as he was with most everyone else at the school, but he clearly didn’t have anything to volunteer for the conversation. “We all have secrets, you know. All of us. I mean, some more secret than others, of course, but…”

He took his glasses off and set them on the desk in front of him, his chest under the white lab coat rising and falling in a deep, measured breath. “What do you mean, secrets?” There was a bit of a strain to his voice, too.

“Oh, come on. Woman my age owns a house outright and is teaching at a high school?” Darcy raised her eyebrows at him. “Probably a back story to that somewhere.” She grinned. “I’m cracking open a bottle of wine tonight, and I have some tomato soup and grilled cheese calling my name. You want some company who’s not gonna ask questions or judge, I’m at 1641 Holly Circle.” He didn’t answer, so she slid off the desk, landing easily in her low-heeled boots.

She’d almost made it to the door when his voice called her attention back over her shoulder. “What kind of wine?”

“Well, I hear red always pairs excellently with grilled cheese.” She gave him another grin.

Bill pushed himself to his feet and took off his lab coat, turning to hang it on its hook on the wall. “I should probably say no.”

“Not saying no would probably be a lot more fun, though. I know how you sciency people get, sometimes it’s good to interact with other actual people.” He opened his mouth. “Adults, I mean. Students don’t count. God…” She shook her head. “Sometimes I miss when everything was less… World-altering.”

His eyebrows raised a little at that, but he didn’t ask what she meant. Bill moved across the classroom to join her by the door. “Are you parked behind the school?” He was only about half a foot taller than her, it was nice not having to crane her head back to talk to him.

“Fuck no. I live, like, three blocks away. I walk.”

“Really?” That seemed to actually surprise him.

“Yeah.” Darcy shrugged. “Don’t have to fight through the ice, exercise and all that. I hear it’s good for you.”

He smiled at that, a shy smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes. “I’ve heard that too.”

They got their winter outer layers from the staff room, got all bundled up against the cold winter evening, and headed outside. Darcy jammed her hands deep in the pockets of her thick coat, her eyes trained on the ground in front of her to make sure she didn’t slip on a patch of ice. Last week’s snow had mostly melted, but stubborn bits that were left had long since crusted over and were just waiting to make her fall on her ass.

It didn’t help, though. She stepped on the wrong part of the road and just sort of slid off it, heading straight for Bill. He barely moved as she crashed against his body, his hands coming out to grab her arms and steady her.

“Fuck me, sorry about that.” Darcy made sure she was standing on unslippery ground and let Bill help her upright again. “Bad sense of balance, huh?”

The smile he gave her was very self-effacing. “I don’t do so well around large groups of people, I’d just rather not.”

“No, that’s fair. But what about…” She shoved her hands in her pockets again. It was cold. “What about if there were less people there? Like maybe just two people.”

He seemed to take a second to think about it as they walked along in silence. “Just two people?” Another long pause. “Maybe.”

“Awesome. I am  _way_  better at ice skating than I am at physics.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Where Bruce Banner assumes a pseudonym post-AOU. This was intended to be in the same 'verse as "Not An Archaeologist," for some reason. Only later in the winter. Like mid-January or something.


	9. Darcy/Steve, Secret Santa

“Hey, Steve.” Darcy came around the corner and stopped short when her nose almost met the front of an athletic shirt. Good thing she’d stopped, she’d actually hit her nose on Steve’s chest before and it was like hitting a wall. “Fuck! You know, it would be seasonally appropriate for you to wear jingle bells now, just saying.” She looked up at him to see he was grinning at her completely unapologetically.

His hand came up to her arm to steady her. “Thor said you were looking for me?”

“Yes, because you’re harder to track down than a… than a…” She put her hands on her hips and glared up at him. “Secret Santa. We’re doing it, you’re in, and you’re getting something for me.” She’d set the whole thing up, of course, and was actually a little disappointed that by random drawing, Steve had her. Because other than smacking into the entirely too ogle-worthy wall of his upper body, she and Steve didn’t really have a whole lot of contact, so how would he know what to get her? Even Clint would get her something  _horrible_ , but it would be horrible  _and perfect_.

Not that she was ogling him now. She brought her eyes back up to his face.

Steve shook his head, frowning a little. “Secret Santa?”

“You’ve never…” She stared at him for a second. “Right. So we all put our names into a hat, and randomly  _someone_  goes through and pairs you up with someone else. That way instead of worrying about an entire truckload of presents, and the cost, and forgetting someone, you just have to worry about getting something for one person.” She shrugged. “Me, in this case. But, you know, secret. The only reason I know is that I’m the one putting it all together.”

“And someone has my name?” His eyebrow arched a little.

“Yeah. Someone does.” Nat did, actually. And had gotten the biggest smirk on her face when Darcy told her.

“Okay.” He considered her for a second. “How do you know what to get the person you’re getting something for?”

“If you don’t know, you ask their friends what they like.” She paused. “Just don’t ask Nat.” Because she was pretty sure he’d get an answer that was something along the lines of him wearing nothing but a piece of mistletoe. Which wasn’t an entirely inaccurate representation of what she wanted, but he didn’t need to be finding that out  _from Nat_. That was the sort of thing that should come from her, only, you know, maybe if they got to know each other a little better.

Steve gave her a boyish grin. “I could ask you. Since you already know and everything.”

Mental images of Steve in nothing but strategically placed mistletoe went through her head. “Mistletoe. Wait, I mean… Uh…” But it had already slipped out. She made a face.

His eyes widened, and the grin grew just a little. “Mistletoe? That’s a lot easier than I thought it would be.” He reached up and patted her arm again before moving around her, continuing down the hall to wherever he’d been going.

Darcy let out a long sigh. “Fuck me.” Steve had a history of being pretty adorably clueless with women. Maybe if she was lucky, though, he would attach himself to that mistletoe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S A SECRET!!!!!


	10. Jane/Bucky/Steve, ice skating

 Jane pushed the door open and stepped inside. The TV was on, she could hear that right away. Also, something smelled really good. She only hoped it wasn't a repeat of last week when dinner _smelled_ amazing but they ended up having to go and get something because the taste was... “Who cooked?” She called as she kicked off her shoes and moved her way into the apartment.

James' snicker was audible as she walked into the living room where they were sitting together on the couch. They both looked up as she moved into the room, and James reached out to snag her wrist, pulling her down against them.

“What are you trying to say?” Steve asked, expression completely serious.

But Jane knew better. “That all of us have our strengths, and yours are definitely _not_ in the kitchen.”

James snickered again. “That's not entirely true.”

Jane could feel her cheeks getting a little hot as she remembered exactly what had happened against the counter last night.. She pointedly turned her attention to the TV. “What are you guys watching?” It was pretty obvious what they were watching, though. “I didn't know you were into ice skating.”

“It's a good look at pop culture,” Steve said, resting his hand comfortably against her thigh.

“Darcy told you that, didn't she?” Jane arched an eyebrow at him, and he nodded. She focused on the TV again. “I used to skate.” She could _feel_ the second they both turned their attention to her. “When I was a kid. Dad wanted to make sure I got out of the lab every now and then.”

“Like this?” Steve pointed to the TV.

“Not quite. I was Flounder one year for a performance of The Little Mermaid.” A look back showed James got the reference, but Steve apparently didn't. “Disney.”

The timer went off in the kitchen, and James shifted Jane over until she was sitting completely against Steve before he pushed himself to his feet. He swept his hair back from his face as he moved around the couch to head into the kitchen.

Jane cuddled against Steve, resting her head against his shoulder. His arms came around her, hands loosely settling on her hips. “Have you told him?” Of course, there was a pretty good chance James would hear her even from in the kitchen.

There was no response from the kitchen, though, and she could feel Steve shifting under her as he shook his head. “Not yet. I wanted to wait until you were here. It's really more your news.”

“Dinner.” Jane slid off of Steve and got to her feet, his hand in the small of her back steadying her. James was standing by the corner of the entry that led into the kitchen watching them. She walked over and rested her hand on his shoulder, lifting up on her toes to give him a gentle kiss before going in and sitting down at the table.

When they were all seated, steaming plates of food in front of them, James looked up at Jane. “Tell me what?” A slight tension had settled over him, a look of worry on his face.

“I've been invited to guest-teach in Sweden for the spring semester.” She glanced over at Steve, whose face had turned a little more serious as he pushed a piece of potato around his plate. “Steve won't be able to come with me.”

James looked back and forth between them, then nodded. “We'll figure something out. Is that all?” The tension seemed to drain out of him. “I thought it was somethin' serious. We'll work it out.” He nodded. “It's not like you're pregnant or anything.”

Jane looked down at her plate, appetite suddenly gone. “About that...” Silence. You could have heard a pin drop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!!


	11. Jane/Steve, Secret Santa

 Jane gave the scrap of cloth Darcy was holding a dubious look. “Why, exactly, do you want me to put on the blindfold?”

Darcy sighed and pushed the thing at her. “So I can give you your present. Presents are supposed to be a surprise.”

Jane folded her arms. “That's what wrapping paper is for. Besides, I thought Steve was your Secret Santa person.”

“He is. I'm just helping yours out. Your present is too big to wrap.” When Jane arched an eyebrow, Darcy pushed the blindfold at her again. “Because you trust me. Just put this on.”

Jane glanced from the dark purple fabric to Darcy's face, and then back again. “Fine.” She took the blindfold and put it over her head, tying it securely under her ponytail. “There. Now I can't see anything.”

“Good! Now hold my hand, we're gonna walk somewhere. And it's important that you stay absolutely quiet.” Darcy's fingers curled around hers.

“You're serious?”

“Yes. Absolutely quiet.”

Jane sighed, but she stopped talking. Darcy's hand pulled gently against hers, and she started walking in a slow, straight line. Okay, that was the door to her lab, she knew where she was. And they turned left down the hall, still knew where they were.

Around about the third corner, though, Jane had completely lost track. Her other hand had come up to rest on the inside of Darcy's elbow because it helped her feel a little more secure about letting her friend lead her who-knew-where around the Tower. It was hard to judge distance, too, and the passage of time. She had no one to know how long they'd walked. There was an elevator ride, though. That much she knew.

Eventually they came to a stop. Darcy shook free of her hand, and then she felt two hands close over her upper arms. “Move forward.” Jane moved forward until the gentle pressure from the hands stopped. “Stop right there.”

Something bumped gently into the back of her knees. “Now sit down.” Jane sat down one what felt like a padded surface of some sort. It was soft, but there was a solid backing just underneath. “And...”

Quick fingers pulled at the knot at the back of her blindfold, and Jane brought her eyes up to shade them from what would undoubtedly be too much light. The ends of the blindfold fell free, but it was held in place by her palms over her eyes.

She sneaked one hand away, the fabric falling away from her left eye, and cracked her eyelids open. The first thing to notice was that it wasn't bright at all. There appeared to be candlelit just in front of her, and the multicolored lights of a Christmas tree off to the right. Jane dropped her other hand, and her eyes immediately widened as she took in what was in front of her.

It was a table with food on it. And on the other side of the table was Steve, looking just as recently blindfolded as she had been. She looked over to where Natasha and Darcy were standing between the table and the Christmas tree. Darcy was grinning, and Natasha had a big smirk on her face. “Uh...”

“I wanted you guys naked, but Nat said it would probably go better if you got there on your own. By the way, there's some cushions and stuff behind the tree.” Darcy gave her a not-at-all-subtle wink, and then the two other women turned and left the room. She was pretty sure she heard Darcy laughing on their way out.

Jane looked back to Steve, her mouth turning up in an embarrassed smile. “Darcy said she was bringing me to my present.” Well, if this was it, Steve was a little too big to wrap. “So... I'm guessing it's dinner? With you?”

Steve looked slightly bemused. “I guess so. Did you...” He glanced around the room, seeming to take everything in as he looked.

“Have any idea? No. Darcy just told me my present was too big to wrap and brought me here.” Although that sent some pretty interesting mental images through Jane's mind. She looked down at her plate, hoping that the dim light would hide the sudden heat in her cheeks. “I don't wanna keep you from anything.”

He was quiet for a few moments until she looked back up to see he was peering at her. “I dunno, I'd kinda like to have dinner with you. I mean, if that's okay.”

Jane's grin grew, and she nodded as she looked across at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AWWWWWW!!!!


	12. Darcy/Sam, cookies

Darcy put on her oven mitt and opened up the stove. A wave of heat washed over her as she reached into and grabbed the cookie sheet, sliding it out and resting it on top of the stove. Shortbread. They looked good, not too brown or anything. She let out a sigh, resting her hand across the mound of her belly as she looked at the dough that was still in the bowl, and the tins of cookies that were already filled on the other counter.

“Hey, Darcy?” Sam's sleepy voice pulled her attention back out of the kitchen towards where he was standing in just a pair of green flannel pajama pants with Christmas penguins on them. “What are you doing?”

She gestured to the mixing bowl and rolling pin that were waiting for her. She'd thought it was pretty self-evident, but... Apparently not? “Baking?”

“At...” He rested his hands on his hips and looked over at the glowing numbers displayed on the microwave. “3:30 in the morning?”

Darcy followed his gaze. “3:32. And yes, absolutely. _Someone_ couldn't sleep because _someone else's_ son decided that my ribs make just the best trampoline.” So she'd decided to be productive. Apparently some people got the cleaning bug while they nested, but all Darcy wanted to do was bake all the things for everyone. “Moving around while I bake apparently helps him settle.” She made a face. “And I was craving shortbread.”

Sam moved across the kitchen and stopped beside her, pulling her against him. “You could have woken me up, you know. I'd go out and get you shortbread.” He leaned down and kissed her temple.

“Not my Nana's recipe. You should try one, they're _amazing_.” She winced as the muscles around her belly tightened, rubbing her hand along the bottom of the sizeable bump.

“Contraction?” Sam rubbed her lower back. When she nodded, he kissed her temple again. “Is there anything I can get you?”

“Can you pull the flour down for me? I don't know that I'll have enough for the rest of the dough.” Normally it was something she could stretch up and reach, but she had the maneuverability of a manatee or something, and it just wasn't happening.

“Why don't you come back to bed?” He bent down to kiss the side of her neck. “See if we can't work on evicting your cranky tenant?”

It was really tempting. Before settling in to bake cookies, she'd already made a couple laps of the residential floor before her sciatic nerves decided they'd had enough. She was _so_ ready to just be done. Darcy made another face. “I'm all huge and awkward.”

“Hey.” Sam waited until she looked at him before continuing. “You're beautiful. Put your dough in the fridge and come back to bed, baby. I'll get the flour down in the morning, okay?” He grinned a little as he reached up and swiped his finger down the length of her nose. “Flour.”

She couldn't help but smile, even though she maybe didn't want to. “You really have to stop being so sweet all the time.” But she moved over to the counter and tore off a length of aluminum foil to cover the dough.

“I'll work on that.” He was right there, and as soon as she was done he took the bowl and went to put it in the fridge.

“You won't.”

“Probably not.” He offered her his hand, and she went over to take it, letting him lead her back down the hall towards their bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sam would be the most supportive dad-to-be ever.


	13. Jane/Bucky, mistletoe

 Jane paced back and forth across the hard floor of the lab. She tried to keep her eyes on the floor in front of her, but her gaze kept lifting up to the little bit of green that was hanging from the ceiling _just over there_. She hadn't put it there. Darcy hadn't put it there. Darcy had assured her that none of the other actual users of the lab floor had hung it up there. So who had?

And why did it matter, anyway? It just a little piece of plastic, it wasn't like it really meant anything. Except kisses. And it was hung over the chair that James usually sat in when he came to hang out in her lab. He wouldn't have, would he? Darcy had said no one who actually used the lab floor, but James didn't so much use it as he did just hang out in her lab. So did he count? Did he not count?

JARVIS hadn't been any help. Apparently the hanging of the mistletoe didn't show up on the security feed for whatever reason. And he didn't know _why_ it didn't show up.

She glanced up at the mistletoe again. She needed to stop. It wasn't a big deal. It wasn't a big deal _at all_.

The door open and Jane let out a squeak as she turned to see who it was. She'd been so caught up in the damn mistletoe that she hadn't noticed someone walking up, despite the fact that the hall-bordering wall was completely made of glass.

It was James, of course, who was smiling a little bit that he'd made her jump. She watched him carefully, but he _didn't_ look up at the mistletoe or indicate in any way that he even knew it was there. Was that because he'd been a spy? Or because he really didn't notice it was there? Wouldn't he notice it automatically? James was the kind of guy who took in every detail of his surroundings...

“Hey,” he greeted. He didn't immediately move over to it either. “Not working?”

Jane shook her head. “No, I'm trying to... Figure something out.”

“Okay.” He stood there for a second looking at her. “Did you want to go get some coffee? Would that help?”

She sighed. She'd been so preoccupied with the mistletoe that she hadn't gotten any actual work done since she'd come down to her lab. “No, I should probably get some work done.”

“Okay.” He shrugged, more the right shoulder than the left, and moved through the lab until he was sitting in the chair he'd claimed as his. Right under the stupid piece of mistletoe that Jane couldn't stop dwelling on. He liked to hang out in her lab, he said it was quieter and more peaceful than the rest of the Tower. He didn't make a whole lot of noise or really disturb her in any way, so she was perfectly happy to have him there.

And, of course, he was nice to look at.

He still didn't seem to have seen the mistletoe, but was that all an act? Sighing again, Jane moved over to her own desk and sat down, rubbing her finger quickly along the touchpad to get it to stop sleeping. She really did need to get some work done.

It was like she could _feel_ it, though, hanging there and looking at her. Which was just insane because it was a piece of plastic and not a sentient life form. Still, though, she knew it was there.

She whirled from her computer, got to her feet, and marched over to where James was looking up at her, eyes slightly widened in surprise. She rested her hands on his shoulders and leaned down until her lips touched against his.

He stilled at the contact, like he'd just turned into stone right in front of her. Jane pulled back immediately. Maybe... Maybe not such a good idea. “Sorry.” She turned to go back to her desk, cheeks so hot she was sure she was glowing, but a hand closed gently around her wrist.

“Jane?” Uncertainty was thick in his deep, soft voice.

Sighing again, she turned and pointed up at the mistletoe above his head. “I thought maybe you put it there because you wanted to-”

Before she could even finish talking, he'd pulled her down onto his thigh, his lips hard against hers like there was nothing else in the world that mattered.

And really, just then, nothing else did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Steve did it. Nat helped cover it up.


	14. Darcy/Daniel, cookies

 Darcy did the grocery bag shuffle, reaching into her purse to fish out her key to Daniel's house. Not that she was actually living with him or whatever. You know, not officially. Although that would definitely make things easier.

She got the door unlocked and pushed it open. “It's me,” she called, in case he hadn't heard the key. It took some more shuffling to actually be able be able to _walk_ inside, but the door was closed with a bump of her hip.

Daniel appeared in the entryway from the kitchen. “I could have helped you with some of that.”

“I know.” She moved past him and set the bags down on the counter. “But then I would have had to come up here, gotten you, gone back out to the car, come back inside... Believe me, if cellphones were a thing yet, I totally would have.”

He walked past her to where he had a bunch of paper all spread out over the table, his hand brushed against her back as he went behind her. Darcy focused for a second on the sprawl of paper. “Are you bringing work home again?” She was mostly teasing, as the chief Daniel was never really done working. Like, ever.

“You're not in the office today, and I'd rather be around you than the guys.” He settled himself down in the wooden chair again, and his dark eyes came up to focus on the bags she was starting to unload. “What did you get?”

“Baking stuff.” She hadn't really thought this far ahead yet. Darcy had never lived in a place that didn't have a baking cupboard, but Daniel certainly didn't. So... Where was everything going to go? On the counter for now so that she could bake, obviously, but when it was time to clean up? Well, she'd get there when it was time to worry about it.

“Why?”

She glanced over at him, eyebrows raised as a small grin came over her face. “So I can bake? Where else are you getting Christmas cookies?” She sighed and made a face. “I should probably make some for the office too, even though those assholes don't deserve them.” She started filling the sink with hot water so she could wash the mixing bowl and all the measuring stuff she'd just bought. “Will you be in the office on Christmas?”

“Not officially.” Not unless he got called in, then.

“Do you want ham or turkey? And also I kinda invited Angie and Peggy over.” She made another face as she glanced at him. “Sorry. I know I should have asked first, but Peggy was all-” Darcy pressed her lips together. “- and Angie was all-” She pouted. “So I kinda had to. I mean...” She sighed, waving the spoon in the air. “I guess I could do something at Howard's townhouse if it's not okay, but...”

He smiled at her, a warm smile with just a hint of shyness. “It's okay.”

“Oh good.” She turned off the faucet and dumped everything in the soapy water before moving across to where Daniel was sitting. When he pushed the chair back a little bit, she moved between his legs and sat down on his thigh, her arm across the back of his shoulders. “So ham or turkey?”

He tilted his head up for the gentle kiss she gave him. “Ham?”

Darcy nodded. “Ham's good. Less leftovers. Like, I like turkey, but after a week I get a bit _I never want to see a bird every again_.” She brushed her lips against his again. “Did you know butter dropped in price again? Which is good, 'cause I had to get, like a pound.” She nodded. “I'm basically going to be baking for the rest of the day, so if you need anything, now's the time to tell me.”

His arms rested easily around her waist. “I can't think of anything right now.”

“Okay. Should we ask Howard? Although if we ask Howard, we need to ask the Jarvises.” She thought for a second. “Oh shit, I think Tim's gonna be in town...” She sighed again, resting her forehead against his shoulder. Even if no one else was invited, she'd _have_ to ask Tim. But since Tim would probably be staying with Howard...

“Maybe we should get a turkey, then.”

She lifted her head, peering down into his face. He was smiling as he looked up at her. “Are you sure? Like, that's a lot of people.”

He reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I know it'll make you feel better.”

That wasn't entirely untrue. Christmas had been a little rough for a little while, and she was maybe going a little bit overboard this year with everything to try and make up for it. And Daniel was amazing, letting her turn his house into sort of a Christmas explosion. “You're really the best, you know that?”

His smile grew, his fingers slipping into the hair at the base of her neck to pull her down for another kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> '40s Darcy!!


	15. Darcy/Johnny Storm, Secret Santa

 Darcy flopped down on one of the two rather frayed chairs that was sitting in the hall opposite the elevator. She narrowed her eyes at her tablet as she stabbed at it with her finger. Richards- Dick, she was totally calling him Dick from now until forever- hadn't started out too bad. But then she'd had to bring up Victor, like, actually _had_ to, and nothing hit Dick's douchebag button faster than mentioning Victor.

She heard the sound of feet moving towards her across the carpet, and then a pair of legs entered her periphery. She wasn't entirely surprised to look up and see Johnny standing there, he'd always had a knack for finding her. “Hey.” He really wasn't so bad. A little cocky, but she did cocky on a daily basis.

“Did it call you names?” He gestured to the tablet, one eyebrow raised.

“No. Richards was being a dick. I swear, _he's_ the villain in your little sphere of the world.” Victor wasn't really a bad guy. He'd never once insinuated that she got her job with her vagina. She shook her head. “What's up?”

“Secret Santa,” he answered in a sing-song voice. “You should be in, you're here often enough.”

Darcy made a face. “Nope. There's, what, four of you? That's a one in four chance I'll either get Richard, or he'll get me and I'll get, like...” She couldn't even think what Richard would get her. Something horrible, obviously. “Besides, I'm already doing two of them and I really have no clue what to get Maria.” Hank was easy. She knew exactly what to get Hank.

“I'm hurt, Darcy.” He clutched his hands to his chest dramatically. “Wounded! You're practically part of the family already!” She rolled her eyes, but she was smiling a little. He pointed to her face. “There. That's what I like to see. See? I made your day better already, just by being here. Man, I _am_ good.”

“You know what else makes my day better? Kittens.” Darcy nodded. She volunteered at an animal shelter in the few off-hours she had, and kitten therapy was the actual best.

“So...” Johnny slid easily into the chair next to her, his arm automatically going across the back of her chair. “If someone was to get you a kitten...” His fingers curled over her shoulder. He ran hotter than even Thor or Steve, but it wasn't uncomfortable.

“Someone better not get me a kitten.” She made a face. “I'm not home enough to take care of a kitten.” An adult cat would probably work, but she wasn't going to tell _him_ that. That was inviting trouble.

“Hmm. I'll keep thinking then.”

She looked up into his blue eyes. “You don't have to get me anything, you know.”

“I know.” He grinned, giving her shoulder a squeeze. “Although I can think of something I'd like to give you in the near future.”

Tempting. Darcy sighed. “No, I gotta head up to the X Mansion today. I'm getting all of this shit done at once so I can take the weekend and, I don't know. Not work, anyway.” At least all that was waiting for her at the X Mansion was hugs. Hugs were good. “Oh, I do know something you can do for me.”

His lips curved up into a dangerous smile, and Darcy blanked out for a second. “Not that.” Although... No. Work. “January 7 we're going to have a giant meeting thing with everyone. Representatives from everyone, anyway. You should come.”

His expression turned serious, and he looked down at her for a second without saying anything. “I don't really know that that's a good idea.”

“Dick- I mean Richards  _can't_ go, or we're going to spend the whole time listening to he and Tony snipe at each other and nothing will get accomplished. Sue can't go, because where Sue goes...” Also there was a chance Victor was going to be there and if for some strange reason Sue went and Richards  _didn't_ , then he'd be all, 'Victor's going to kidnap her, I will tear this city apart, blah blah blah.' “And Ben's still pretty self-conscious around groups of people.” Even fellow not-entirely-human-looking people, because chances were pretty good that Hank was going to be there. "So...” She trailed off and gestured to him.

“I'm not really qualified.” He shook his head slowly.

She scanned his face, taking in the doubt, the worry. “You're not stupid, Johnny. I know living with actual scientific geniuses can make you feel like it sometimes, but you're not stupid. Just... Think about it, okay?” She leaned forward to give him a quick kiss before getting to her feet. “I need to go. I should be home tonight if you happen to remember which balcony is mine.”

As she hit the button for the elevator, she could feel the heat of his body behind her. “I'll walk you out. I'd never miss a chance to go down on you.” A pause. “I mean... With. Well, that first thing too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Richard is a dick, though. And Johnny has feels. AWWWWW


	16. Darcy/Jensen, Secret Santa

 “Hey, Darcy?” Jensen called from the living room.

She'd left the door to her office open specifically so she could hear him, and she got up and went to the open door. “Yeah?” He looked okay. He was laying on her couch playing something on her Xbox. Well, he _had_ been, now the controller was resting against the admittedly fine abs hidden away under his t-shirt. “You okay?”

He was laying low at her house because he'd gotten himself shot. You know, again. And her house was safe. He wasn't a bad houseguest, even though he did toss and turn all night long which kinda bounced the bed a little. “I'm fine. Just... Clay? You know him pretty well, right?”

Darcy's eyebrows raised a little and she grinned. “Yeah. You could probably say that.” She leaned her hip against the doorframe.

“So what would he want for Christmas?”

Her grin grew. “I can think of several things he wants for Christmas.”

“No, I mean...” He shook his head abruptly. “Something I can give him. We're doing Secret Santa, and I have _no_ clue what to get him.”

“You still have a mouth right?” She gave him a pointed look.

“I do have a mouth...” Jensen actually appeared to think about it for a second. “Wait. No! I'm not blowing Clay.” His blue eyes narrowed a little as he looked at her.

She shrugged. “Suit yourself. Then I have absolutely no idea.” She glanced over her shoulder back into her office at her mug. Her _empty_ mug. “You want some more coffee while I'm up?”

“I wouldn't say no.”

She grabbed her mug and picked his up on the way from her office to the kitchen. The coffee was still hot, and she filled both mugs, doctoring just hers. Jensen drank his black for whatever reason, probably got used to it in the army.

By the time she got back to the living room, Jensen had pulled himself into a sitting position, leaving room for her on the couch. “This is a lot more comfortable than the couch you used to have.”

“It is, isn't it?” She handed him his mug before lowering herself gingerly down beside him. The lights from the Christmas tree splattered rainbows across his white shirt. “Are you going to go see your sister after you get out of here?”

He nodded. “For a bit, I think. Christmas with kids is the best.”

Darcy grinned. “Just be careful. If you end up hurting yourself again, I think Clay might actually kill you.”

He winced. “I know.” He paused, peering at her from behind his glasses. The controller was balanced on his knee, his game paused. “Really no idea what to get him?”

“Well, you already rejected my ideas, so I'm all out.” Her eyebrows raised again as she set the mug on the table beside her. She reached over to grab the controller and unpaused the game. “What do you want?” She could feel him looking at her, and shook her head, rolling her eyes. “Besides that.”

“I dunno. I can't keep a whole lot of stuff around now that I'm dead, so...” He shrugged.

Darcy frowned at the TV. “Do you want to go through my office later and make a list? I can probably get ahold of anything you want. Send it to your sister's if you're gone by the time it gets here.”

“I'd kiss you, but I'd probably tear my stitches trying to get over there.”

She turned to look at him and grinned. “You can make it up to me later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He makes it up to her by cleaning and making spaghetti. *nod* Mmm... spaghetti...


	17. Darcy/Bucky, snowed in

 “Oh, the weather outside is frightful,” Darcy sang as she added another piece of wood to the fire burning away in the fireplace. She sent another mental _thank you_ to whoever had left them a gigantic pile of dry firewood, because they were sure using it. The cabin had a heating system attached to the generator, but James preferred the fire because it kept the draft away better. He never complained, but she always saw him rubbing at where the metal met his chest whenever he got too cold.

“You're in a good mood,” he said from somewhere behind her. The entire cabin was somewhere behind her, but he had been getting the dishes done so he was probably still in the kitchen. Probably. “Especially since now that we can't leave today.”

They were supposed to be leaving by quinjet that afternoon, but a blizzard had rolled into the area and their departure had been delayed by at least a day.

Darcy poked at the burning wood with the poker, arranging them just a little bit better before laying the tool down and getting to her feet. “Could be worse.” She turned around to see him standing over by the sink, a dishtowel slung carelessly over his shoulder. “We've got food, lots of firewood.” Being stuck there with James certainly wasn't a hardship. Not only was he easy on the eyes, but he did things like help out with the daily chores. She rubbed her hands across her thighs, brushing off the dust and dirt from the firewood.

“Nowhere comfortable to sleep.”

Darcy heaved a huge sigh, rolling her eyes. She was tired of hearing it. The couch was horribly uncomfortable, admittedly, but he'd refused the bed every time she'd offered it. “Last I checked there was actually still a bed in the other room. Has it...” She leaned forward, turning to peer at the bedroom door. “Has it vanished in the night? Should we look for it?” She took an exaggerated look around the room. “I sure hope it didn't get outside while we weren't looking, we'll never find it.”

“You're not sleepin' on the couch.” There was a particularly stubborn set to his jaw when she straightened up and looked over at him.

She shrugged. “Okay.” Her hands came up to her hips and she gave him her very best Pepper-look. “But you're not sleeping on the couch either. I'll steal the cushions if I have to.” Not that she'd really be able to put them anywhere he couldn't find them. She could toss them out in the snow, but then he'd probably go out after them, and then she'd feel guilty about how cold he got...

“But then you'd be sharin' a bed with a strange man.” His gaze was locked on hers.

Her eyes moved over him, and she shrugged. “I promise you, I've shared a bed with stranger men. You're not so bad. I mean, maybe you should sleep on the left so that I don't get my hair caught in your arm.” She paused for a second, thinking. “Unless you're a stomach-sleeper. Are you a stomach-sleeper?” She hadn't seen him sleeping on his front, but there wasn't really enough room on the couch for it.

“No.” James pulled the dishtowel off his shoulder and dropped it on the counter behind him, taking a couple steps towards her. “You ain't afraid I'll try somethin'?”

“Not... Really. See...” She swallowed as he walked towards her, eyes dark. “I've been sleeping in there. I'm pretty sure that if you _wanted_ to try something, a thin wooden door really wouldn't _stop_ you. I'd be more worried about yourself. I gravitate towards heat sources when I sleep.” She'd woken up barnacled against Thor on more than one occasion. “So if _that's_ what's stopping you, then I will totally take the couch.” She lifted her chin, trying for another Pepper-look.

He came to a stop just in front of her, and she was suddenly hyper-aware of the pull that had been growing between them since they'd got there that she'd been trying her level best to ignore. This was the closest he'd ever purposefully been. His right hand made a loose fist at his side. “Dunno if I could stop myself with you pressed up against me.”

Darcy licked her lips, looking up into his face. “Okay.” She wasn't entirely sure what she was agreeing to. Probably everything.

His hand unballed and came out towards her, resting on her hip. He looked a question at her, and she nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND THE FIRE IS SO DELIGHTFUL!!!!


	18. Darcy/Johnny Storm, Santa Claus

 It was always hard to miss when Johnny landed on her balcony, what with the sudden flash of orange fire glowing through her sliding glass door. The tree was in front of the balcony, just to the side so that he'd actually be able to, you know, get in and out. So she moved around the tree and unlocked the door, sliding it open to let him inside.

He stepped over the lip of the sliding door and into the apartment, completely unflaming. He was wearing his special suit, of course, so that it didn't burn up when he flew over. “How were the gifted youngsters?” He closed the door behind him and locked it. The first time he'd come in via balcony, Tony had thrown a fit. There had been discussions, Tony had calmed down about it.

“Good.” Darcy nodded. “Ready for some snow.” It was an unseasonably warm winter this year. Yay global warming.

Johnny shook his head a little. “Don't they have people who can make snow over there?”

She made a face. “Bobby makes ice, which... Not the same as snow. And the people who can control weather have to be super careful about it because if they do it too much it can cause long-term ecological issues.” That was actually in her list of shit to talk to people about, all officially and everything.

“That sucks. Thankfully I don't have the same problem.”

“Yeah, you can just crouch down by the wall over there and I can hang stockings over you.” She grinned, gesturing to the wall over by the couch.

“Hmm...” Johnny glanced up at the ceiling and seemed to think for a minute. “I am now picturing you in stockings and garters.” His eyes dropped back to her. “Is it too late to change what I'm asking for for Christmas?”

“What _are_ you asking for, anyway?” She moved back around the tree to where she had been. There was a box of ornaments open on the floor down by where she'd been standing, and she bent down to pick one up.

“Watching you do that is definitely on the list.” When Darcy straightened up, Johnny was standing there with his arms folded, quite obviously checking out her ass.

She rolled her eyes. “You could at least be subtle about it.” She reached up to hang the ornament near the top of the tree before stooping down to get another one.

“I'm super subtle. Hey.” She heard him moving a little bit closer, the shift of the fabric rubbing against itself. “Is that... Ben?”

“Of course.” Darcy grabbed the next ornament, which was Sue dressed up like Santa, just like Ben was. “I have all of you guys. It amuses me to no end that Richards-Santa is on my tree.” Because he'd _hate_ it. “And I have the Avengers, and Spider-Man...” She paused for a second, shaking her head, before leaning in to put Sue over _there_. “There are a lot superheroes in New York. Well, I guess it makes my job easier.” She straightened up and rested her hands on her hips, looking over at Johnny.

He was still peering at her tree. “Am I on there yet?”

“Not yet. You can put yourself up if you want.” She leaned over again, pulling the orange and blue Johnny-Santa out of the box. His hand was outstretched, and she placed the ornament in it. “So, question avoidy guy, what do you want for Christmas?”

He glanced back at her, then back at the tree. It took a few second, but he seemed to find the perfect spot because he hung the ornament and then fully focused his attention on her. His hands came out, sliding over her hips and pulling her to him. Even through her sweater and jeans his skin was really warm. “All I want for Christmas is you?”

“I think I can do something about that.” She reached up to wrap her arms around his neck, head back to look up into his face. “Anything specific?”

“Naked. I like naked a whole lot.” Johnny grinned at her.

“I can do that.” She nodded. “I know how to take my clothes.” She ran her fingernail gently across the back of his neck. “Or you could unwrap your own present...”

“As often as you'll let me.” His eyes flicked back and forth between her own. “If it were up to me, you'd never wear clothes again. Well... hardly ever. I don't think they'd let you drive around town naked.” He leaned in and whispered, “I've tried. It didn't go over well.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He flew naked across the city, though, not drove. This continues pretty much right after the other Darcy/Johnny fic in this collection.


	19. Jane/Bucky, fireplace

 “Of all the things I've seen you get up to in here, that might just be the strangest one.”

Jane turned to look over her shoulder at where James was standing behind her and a little off to the side, and she gave him a sheepish smile. “It's a fireplace. Well... Kinda. But I've never really lived anywhere that had an actual fireplace, so I made one.”

“You made that?” He sounded a little impressed. He moved over beside her, his hand brushing over her back and he leaned down to have a closer look.

It was a Bunsen burner, and she'd made a little frame for it out of metal, painted to look like a fireplace. As long as she didn't turn it up too much nothing would burn or scorch or anything. She'd just been adding the little stocking magnets along the top edge of it when James had pulled her attention away. She picked up the last one and stuck it at the end of the row with the other ones. “It's essential lab equipment. SHIELD even confiscated it when they took all our stuff in New Mexico.” She'd been pretty relieved to get it back in one piece. It was _silly_ , but it was tradition.

James bent towards it, his eyes picking through the names on the stockings. There was her name, of course, Erik, Darcy, Thor, and now James at the end. “Is that one for me?”

“Yeah, it's...” She turned away, heat flooding her face. “It's silly, I know. I don't have to leave it up there if you don't want me to.” The box of Christmasy lab stuff was on the floor, and the string of LED lights that went on the wall around the fireplace was still in there. She'd have to get up on the table for that, but at least the tables were sturdy.

“No, it's just...” Warm fingers closed around her hand, tugging gently until she turned back towards James. “Why do I get one?”

“Well...” She stepped into him and rested her other hand against his chest, staring at the zipper on the front of his shirt that rested just below his throat. “Stockings are for family, right? Dad's gone and Mum went back to the UK when I was just a kid, so I've kinda picked up other family along the way.”

“I'm family?” The question was soft, hesitant.

“Yeah.” Jane smoothed her hand down over his chest. “I know you have Steve, which is great, but we're living together, so...” She raised her eyes to look up into his piercing blue ones. “Unless you're not?” She paused for a second. “Aren't you?” She didn't want to push him into anything.

He searched her eyes for a moment, and then he leaned down to seal his lips over hers. His lips were soft, but the sharp stubble on his face prickled against her skin. He pulled away after just a moment. “Sorry. I haven't shaved yet today.” He reached up to rub his thumb gently over her chin.

“It's okay.” Jane was grinning as she looked up at him. “So are we family?”

“I think so. Maybe soon...” His expression turned serious as he looked over her face. “Maybe soon we'll make it official.” There was a question in his voice.

“Official. Official?” She blinked up at him. “Married? You mean, get married? To you?”

“Yes?” That was definitely a question.

“Okay.” She blurted it out before he'd even really finished speaking. “If you want to. I'm keeping my name, though.” Her eyes widened a little as she looked up at him. She hoped that was okay. “I know that's not really what you're probably used to, but with my career and everything I've published, changing my name would really make a lot of things difficult for me.” She grimaced a little. It would be okay, right?

James smiled, a small smile at first that spread into a broad grin. “That's okay.”

Jane let out a little sigh of relief. Her eyes narrowed at a sudden thought as she looked up at him. “Wait. Are we engaged? Did we just get engaged? Or was that pre-engagement negotiation?”

He didn't really seem entire sure, either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes. Yes they did.


	20. Darcy/Daisy, ice skating

 Darcy looked up from where she was flopped back against the pillows of the bed with her tablet on her knee. “Have you really never been ice skating?” They'd all talked about ice skating earlier over dinner, and that had stuck with her.

Daisy was stretched out on her stomach poking at her laptop, and her eyes widened a little as she looked up at Darcy. “Kinda never really came up in any of my foster homes.”

“Hmm.” Darcy stared at her for a second. “We should go. Next time you have a second where you're not training for _something_.” Because Daisy was fulltime getting out in the field now that Darcy was there to pick up the tech stuff.

“Are you kidding? Fall on my ass on a cold, hard surface over and over again? I can do that here for free and not look stupid.” Daisy pressed her lips together. “If I'm gonna break something, I'd rather do it here. Jemma doesn't laugh at me when she puts me back together.”

Darcy set her tablet on the table beside the bed and scooted down until she was more eye-level with the other woman. “Everyone falls. That's half the fun. You fall, you pull your partner down with you, you laugh, you get up and keep going.”

“Your partner?” Daisy raised an eyebrow. “I am definitely not up for that whole pairs skating thing.”

Darcy gave her a look. “Have you never seen winter-themed romantic comedies ever? You glide around the ice holding hands.” She reached over and took one of the other woman's hands, twining their fingers together. “And then when you fall, and someone always falls, you sprawl together on the ice all laughing and shit. It's cheesy.” She grinned. “And then someone can kiss you all better?”

“Someone?”

Darcy leaned forward and brushed her lips gently against Daisy's. “Someone.”

Daisy smiled as Darcy pulled back, and she nodded. “Okay. I'll try it.” She paused. “Once. But if I actually break anything I'm blaming you.”

“I will take that blame. It's not like Coulson would do anything except give me disapproving eyebrows. Luckily, I'm immune to disapproving eyebrows. Speaking of...” Darcy stared up at the ceiling. “We need to do some shopping, anyway. You'll want to get Coulson something. Are you gonna get something for your dad?” They didn't really talk about her dad a whole lot, but she knew he was constantly on Daisy's mind.

The other woman sighed, pushing down the top of her laptop to close it and rolling onto her side. She propped her head up on one hand, the fingers of the other still laced with Darcy's. “I don't know. He doesn't know who I am anymore, would it be just a little creepy to have some strange woman just giving you things?”

Darcy shrugged. That was a good point, but there were always ways around that. “Okay, so make it something that's more casual and less, you know, intimate or whatever, and have it delivered or mailed or something. Before you became a technically-dead, top secret government agent bred for suspicion, wouldn't you have loved it if your favorite cake or whatever just showed up at your door. Just, Merry Christmas, have some cake? And he has patients, right, so it _could_ be from one of them.”

“But then what's the point?”

Darcy's eyebrows raised and she gave Daisy another look. “Seriously? Do we give people gifts for recognition, or because they mean something to us and we want them to have something they'll enjoy?” Daisy sighed, and she did too. “If you're not there... Like, I totally get that. It's a thing, and that's fair. But if you want to, then you totally should.”

“I'll think about it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> She sends the cake. And cookies. Now I want cookies.


	21. Darcy/Magneto, ice skating

 Darcy let herself fall a little bit behind Erik and narrowed her eyes as he stared down at his feet. There was something not entirely right about the way he was gliding along the ice, like his gait was a little off or something. She watched for a few seconds. Too bad his coat was too long for her to check out his ass while she was back there. Nope, she knew what it was.

She sped up again until she was keeping pace with his long strides again, reaching down to take his gloved hand in hers. “You're cheating.”

He glanced down at her for a second before his attention back to the smooth ring they were making around the ice rink. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

She reached over to poke his side through his thick winter coat. “You know exactly what I'm talking about. You're cheating. Your blades are made out of metal, and you're totally cheating.”

He gave her one of those sanguine smiles of his. “I'm not cheating, I'm just using my natural abilities. Some of us are good at skating...” He gestured to her with his free hand. “Some of us have other talents.”

Darcy rolled her eyes, swiveling around until she was facing him, moving easily backwards across the ice. “Right. Like you can make people fly if they have enough metal on them?” She took his other hand, holding them up between them.

“It's more about distribution.” He looked down at their hands, but didn't question it. “I could certainly lift you up in the air right now, but you'd flip upside-down because of weight distribution.”

She made a face. “Let's not, 'cause as much fun as _that_ sounds...”

Erik leaned down to kiss her, and she tilted her face up to him, her grip tightening on his hands. Because while _he_ may have been totally confident about where his skates were going, she was subject to things like the laws of physics.

His lips were cold against hers. Able to move metal around with a thought or not, he was still subject to the elements. And so was she. When he straightened away, she looked into his blue eyes. “We should probably go get warm before we turn into ice cubes.”

He nodded, so when they came around to the exit to the rink, Darcy stopped and very carefully stepped out onto the surrounding concrete. Erik stepped out easily beside her, his balance no doubt aided by not physics-obeying forces. They got changed back into their regular shoes, Erik turned his skates back into the rental place.

“So,” Darcy said, her skates-containing-backpack swung easily over her shoulder as they ambled hand-in-hand towards the exit to the sport complex. “Ice skating. Yes? No?”

“Yeah, it was all right.” His face gave absolutely nothing away when she glanced up at him.

“Even though you were cheating?” She raised her eyebrows and gave him a pointed look.

He grinned at that. “Using my natural abilities.” He looked like he'd had fun. She hadn't been entirely sure, but he looked more relaxed than he usually did. He hadn't exactly had an easy life before he came forward through time, and even now it was kinda iffy. She'd suggested ice skating as a way to get away from everything for a while and just pretend to be normal people. Well, as normal as a person could get when they could just sort of move metal around.

“So I should totally get you your own pair of skates and we'll come do this every other day until the rink closes?”

“I wouldn't go that far.” They were at the end of the hall near the doors that would lead outside in the chilly winter air, and he stepped over to the wall, turning to face her and pull her gently against him. “It was nice to get out, though. Thank you.” She could hardly feel his gloved hands in the small of her back through her thick winter coat.

“Well, of course.” She went up on her toes and kissed his chin, the highest that she could easily reach without him leaning down to help. “We should go sledding, too.” She paused, eyes narrowing a little. “Plastic sled.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He would totally fuck with a metal sled.


	22. Jane/Bucky, ice skating

 “Jane.” The deep, soft voice pulled her attention from her monitor. He sounded amused.

She looked over at the door to see James standing there with his arms folded and one eyebrow raised. “I'm pretty sure I'm contagious.” Like that would actually convince him to let her keep working. She winced at how rough her voice sounded, like someone had somehow spliced her voice together with Steve's and added a nasal quality to it.

“Whatever it is, I can't get it.” He was always unreally silent when he moved across the hard floor of her lab, and this time was no exception. He came to a stop right in front of her. The fingers of his bionic hand were cool enough against her forehead that she shivered. “101.3. If you're too sick to go on Darcy's ice skating trip, you're too sick to be working.”

“I just got so restless in bed.” It was a half-hearted protest at best.

He looked down at her for a moment before bending down and effortlessly lifting her up into his arms. “Too bad, you're going back there.” She heard the door to her lab open and shut, and she sighed, snuggling her head against his shoulder. To be fair, she was starting to get a little tired. “You know, you're worse than Stevie.”

“Why aren't you going ice skating?” Jane didn't really know what time it was, but it had to be past the time that they all left for another 'group bonding exercise.'

“Because I knew the second you thought no one would be around to notice you'd drag your ass out of bed.” He shifted her a little and reached forward to press the button for the elevator. “You're going back there, and you're staying there.” His voice was firm, but there was a fondness there too.

“Are you going to stay with me?” Jane regretted the question almost as soon as it left her mouth. He probably had better things to do with his time than sit with someone who couldn't go 10 minutes with needing to blow her nose. Because that was attractive.

“How else am I gonna make sure you stay put?” The elevator doors whisked open and James stepped inside, turning to jab at the button for the floor with her apartment on it.

“You don't have to do that.” She rubbed her cheek against the front of his surprisingly soft hoodie, letting her eyes fall shut.

“I've heard that before, you know, won't work on me.” He paused. The easy rhythm of his stride was very soothing. “We'll get you some soup, some tea. You got a TV in your room?”

“Nope.” She shook her head. “Keeping a TV in the bedroom disrupts sleep patterns.” It was getting a little difficult to force the words up from her chest. James was just so comfortable to cuddle against, and warm. Warm was good.

When Jane opened her eyes she was no longer in the elevator. She was... On her couch. She was propped up against something warm, an afghan pulled over her legs.

“Hey.” James' voice was soft as it floated down around her head to her ear. “Feeling a little better?”

She was sitting against him, her back tucked up against his side. And that was his arm around her waist? The TV was on, quietly enough that she could barely hear it. “Sorry I fell asleep on you.”

“Made it a little easier to get you to rest.” She could hear the smile in your voice. “If you can sit up, I'll go get you some tea. You up to eating?”

He moved his arm, and Jane pulled herself forward until she was mostly not leaning against him. As soon as he got up, though, she lay back against the couch cushions, her head resting on the arm. “You really don't have to do that.”

“Seems I've spent half my life carin' for people with more gumption than sense.” His voice got a little fainter as he moved into the kitchen. “How do you take your tea?”

That question made her pause for a second. “I don't really drink tea, just coffee.”

“I'll make it the same way I did for Steve, then.” She could hear him moving around, the fridge opening and closing, cupboards and drawers being moved around. The microwave started up.

Jane focused on the TV, James had been watching... “Is this Toy Story?”

“Yup.” He did seem to like Pixar movies.

In just a few minutes he came back with two steaming mugs, one with the silver handle of a spoon sticking out of it. He rested them on the coffee table and shifted her gently until he'd taken his former place behind her. He gently pulled the wooden table closer so that she'd be able to reach whichever she wanted. His arm settled around her waist again, and Jane found she was perfectly fine with not going back down to her lab.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before they express their true feelings for one another.


	23. Darcy/Sam, snowed in

 It was really starting to pick up out there, Darcy's front window was lost in a haze of dim gray as the wind blew the thickly falling snow around. She settled back against the couch, legs curled under her as she flicked through Tumblr. She'd even unofficially secured a backup power device in case the power went out. Unofficially.

So she was a little surprised when there was a knock on the door. Maybe one of the neighbors needed some bread or something? Shrugging, she set her tablet on the cushion next to her and put her feet on the floor to get to her feet. She totally paused to pull on her fluffy Thor-bear slippers, though, because cold feet were the worst.

The knock at the door sounded again just as she walked up to it. “Yeah, yeah, calm your tits.” She unlocked the door and pulled it open. “Sam?” Sam was standing there, looking pretty frozen. “Uh, come in before you turn into a Samsicle.”

“Too late.” He stepped over the threshold onto the tiny patch of tile that sat just in front of the door. There was a welcome mat there, but it was too small for the amount of snow that he stamped off of his thick boots.

Darcy quickly stepped back so that the rapidly melting snow wouldn't soak her poor slippers. “What are you doing here?”

He took off his goggles and tucked them into a pocket in his tac suit. The wings were still strapped to his back, and he started fumbling at them with his heavy gloves. “Came to make sure you're okay in all of this.”

She started to smile, she just couldn't help it. Reaching up, she batted his hands out of the way. “Seriously? I'm from the midwest, Sam. Being snowed in is kind of my thing.” She quickly got him unbuckled, and he eased his wings to the floor. She really didn't have anywhere to put _those_ , but he seemed okay with leaving them there. “I mean, that's really sweet, but... Like, I am _all_ set on milk and bread.” Toilet paper, too.

He looked down at her for a moment. “That sounds like the type of thing Nat would have known.”

Darcy's eyebrows raised a little as she looked up at him. “Nat sent you out here?”

“Yeah, said I should make sure you'll all set until this is over.” He jerked his thumb over his shoulder at the door.

“Uh huh.” Of course she did. “Well, I don't think you should fly out of her until it calms down a little bit, that just doesn't sound safe at all.” Darcy paused. “Why don't you go hop in the shower, finish thawing, and I'll put on a pot of coffee and make French toast?”

“French toast?” He stooped to start getting his boots off.

“Yeah. You know, blizzard French toast?” She shrugged. “I'll get you a towel.” Leaving him there to deal with his gear, she went down to where the linen cupboard was at the end of the hall and pulled out a towel and a face cloth for him. She made sure the bathroom was, you know, decently tidy and left them on the counter. When she came back out to the living room, he was mostly done pulling off his outer layer. “I have literally _nothing_ that will fit you, is that all dry?”

He looked down at his clothes and nodded. “It'll do. I think my shirt's a little wet.”

“Here.” She held out her hand until he pulled off his athletic shirt and tossed it to her, pointedly _not_ looking at his arms and shoulders. Not at all. Okay, maybe a little. “I'll toss it in the dryer, should be done if you take your time.”

“Great.” Sam broke into an easy smile. “Bathroom's in there?” He pointed to the hall.

“Yeah. First door on your left, I left the light on for you. Help yourself to anything that's in there, I left a towel out for you.”

He moved away from the door and down the hall, and she only checked him out a little. That totally counted. As soon as the door was shut, though, she grabbed her tablet and texted Nat. _I don't know whether to kill you or hug you._

A reply came back almost immediately. _Let me know after the snow stops_. With a winky face and everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nat TOTALLY knew.


	24. Darcy/Rumlow, hot chocolate

 The bed beside her was empty when Darcy woke up, but that wasn't really a surprise. Military types all tended to be early risers, even when they weren't actively on duty. And there was really no way Brock could be any _less_ on duty if he tried.

She pulled herself out of bed and immediately pulled on a pair of yoga pants and a shirt and sweater. Because no matter how good her central heating was, it was _chilly_ in her little house.

She headed out to the kitchen. The coffee pot was still on, and she'd totally get there in a bit, but she'd woken up with a craving. It only took a couple minutes, and then she was sitting at the kitchen table with a steaming mug in front of her that would burn the fuck out of her mouth if she wasn't careful.

Brock came in from wherever he'd been and braced his hand on the back of her chair, leaning over to place a kiss against her earlobe. He paused as he went to straighten up, seeming to hesitate at the sight of the mug. “That's not coffee.”

“Hmm.” She scrolled through Twitter, her eyes scanning over her phone's screen. “You're good at this noticing shit thing, you should be the one in Intel.”

He leaned down again, his lips brushing against her ear as he spoke. “Careful, that sounded a lot like an invitation.”

Darcy grinned. “I'm sure it did. No, it's hot chocolate. 'Tis the season and all that. I figured I'll be decorating the house today, I might as well start out right.”

“Decorating?” This time when he straightened away, he went into the kitchen and she heard the sound of the coffee pot leaving the coffee machine.

“Yeah. You know, tree, sparkly lights...” She paused. “Might even be some mistletoe if you play your cards right.”

“You realize I don't need an excuse to kiss you, right?” Brock came back to the table and settled himself in the wooden chair opposite her, setting his own steaming mug of what definitely _was_ coffee on the smooth surface of the table.

“Fine. See what you're getting in _your_ stocking, grumpy ass.” Her eyes flicked up to him for a second before focusing on her screen again.

“My... Stocking?” She looked up at the disbelief in his raspy voice to see an eyebrow arch sharply up his forehead.

She gave him an even look. “I know you're allergic to fun or whatever, but if you're planning on being here on Christmas you're getting a stocking.” Her own eyebrows rose just a little. “Is this where you say that you have something sudden and unexpected that's calling your name back at the Triskelion?”

“I have plenty of fun.” The smirk that crept over his face at that sent a thrill of heat through Darcy. “You do too, unless you're faking it every time you scream my name. Funny...” His eyes moved over her. “Never feels like you're faking it when you're clenching around me.”

Another jolt of heat accompanied the memories _that_ brought to mind. “Different kind of fun. It's a stocking, Brock, we're not getting a cat together.”

He gave her a broad grin. “You're just jealous because your pussy loves me more.”

“He was still cuddled up to me when I got up this morning.” Her eyes narrowed a little as she looked at him. “You've never really done the whole Christmas thing, have you?”

“No.” The answer was short, brusque.

She shrugged. “Guess there's a first time for everything.” She finally brought her mug to her lips and took a sip, perfect. “Besides, I never said I'd hang the mistletoe from the ceiling. I can think of much more interesting places to put it.” Her eyes dropped pointedly down the part of his torso she could see over the table, then went back up to his face. “I guess if you're not interested, though...”

“On the contrary...” He leaned forward on his elbow on the table. “I'm suddenly _very_ interested.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Oliver the cat. Mentioned, of course. He really does love Darcy more.


	25. Jane/Rhodey/Sam, hot chocolate

 Jane pulled the door to her apartment open and peered down the hall in each direction. There didn't appear to be any movement in their little section of the base, so she pulled the door quietly shut behind her and shuffled down the hall in her fluffy brown dog slippers. They'd been an early gift from Darcy. They were a little ridiculous, but they did a good job of keeping her feet warm, especially on the cold concrete floors of the base. They'd done an excellent job with renovations, but it was impossible to miss that this had used to be some sort of warehouse or storage facility.

The communal kitchen area was down at the far end of the hall. Most of her immediate neighbors were ex-military or SHIELD operatives, which meant they tended to keep fairly regular sleeping hours, and probably wouldn't be up anymore. Which was the only reason she was heading out. It wasn't that she was _intimidated_ by them, it took a lot more than Avengers to intimidate Jane, but...

She shook her head. She really needed to get a handle on her hormones, it was getting a little ridiculous. She couldn't avoid stepping out of her apartment just because she was having a little lust towards some of her neighbors.

Still Jane paused just outside the entrance to the kitchen, but it did sound absolutely silent. So she went around the corner and headed into the gleaming chrome and black room. Only... Not as empty as she'd thought. Sam and James were sitting at the table, each with a steaming cup in front of them.

And it was too late to back out without being noticed. Sam's head swung around immediately. He broke into a smile when he saw her standing there. “Hey. Come on in.”

She looked back and forth between them. “I don't want to interrupt anything...”

“No, come on.” James motioned her over, and she moved through the kitchen to where they were at the table. “Can't sleep?”

She shook her head. “Nope. I slept this afternoon because I was up late last night working and now I can't...” She trailed off as she went to settle herself in the chair to James' right.

Sam patted the seat at the end of the table between them. “Come on, sit down.”

So she went and sat between them. It was hard not to feel a little awkward with two sets of dark eyes resting on her.

Sam offered her the mug that was in front of him. She took it, bringing it up to her face for an experimental sniff. “What is it?” Because it smelled like hot chocolate, but there was a bite underneath that spoke of alcohol.

“Hot chocolate. Well, hot chocolate plus,” James answered with a smile, bringing his own drink to his mouth. “It'll help you sleep.”

She took a sip. It was definitely chocolaty, but... “Kahlua?” Sam nodded. “It's good.” It would definitely help her sleep, and it made a comforting path as the warmth spread down to her stomach. But drinking all of it probably wouldn't be a good idea. She slid the mug back to Sam before she had too much.

James was getting to his feet. She looked a question up at him. “I'll make you your own.”

“Oh, no, that's okay. I don't wanna bother you...” Any heat that she felt in her face as she watched him stretch his arms out to his sides was from the drink she'd had and not the way his upper arms pressed against the sleeves of his dark green t-shirt.

“It's no trouble.”

She watched him over her shoulder for a second before turning her eyes back to the table in front of her.

“Haven't seen you around so much lately.” Sam gently nudged her forearm with his wrist. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah.” She nodded. “Just busy.”

“Well, it's good to see you again.” His smile sent warmth through her much the same way the hot chocolate had.

In short order, James was sitting down at the table again, placing a third mug in front of her. She gave him a small smile. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” He lifted his own mug and saluted her with it before taking a drink.

Jane picked up the mug, cupping both hands around it and letting the heat seep into her skin. She blew across the surface, her breath stirring ripples in the dark brown drink, before lifting it up for a sip.

“You've got a little...” She looked over at Sam, eyes wide. “I'll get it.” He reached up and wiped his thumb slowly across her upper lip, and she felt a jolt of heat go through her even at that light contact. “There.”

A glance over showed James was looking at her exactly the same way Sam was. She ducked her head and took another long drink of her hot chocolate before she did something stupid like kiss one of them. Or both.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BOTH! DO IT FOR SCIENCE!!!


	26. Darcy/Clark Kent, snowballs

 Darcy shifted the plate completely _loaded down_ with holiday baking mostly to her other hand and knocked on the front door. The dog started barking right away, of course, that was to be expected. It only took a couple of minutes until she heard footsteps coming towards the door, and then the door opened. Martha Kent beamed down at her. “Darcy Lewis, it's so good to see you again. Come in, come in.”

Darcy followed the other woman into the house and through to the kitchen, setting the overfull foil-wrapped plate down on the counter. “Mom asked me to bring this over for you.”

“Well thank you, and thank your mother for me. I'll give her a call this afternoon.” Mrs. Kent came over and pulled Darcy into a big hug, which she returned. “Your mom said you were working in the city now, how's that going?”

Darcy sat down at the island counter and had a cup of coffee and some cookies while she caught up with Mrs. Kent. The Kents were the closest neighbors to her childhood home, and she'd spent a lot of time at this very counter when she was little when her mom had to go out for a while.

Darcy was just finishing her coffee and getting to her feet to go and rinse out her mug and put it in the sink when the front door opened. Well, there was really only one person that could be.

“We're in the kitchen,” Mrs. Kent called, and sure enough in just a second Clark was filling the entryway from the hall.

They embraced, and when Clark pulled away, his eyes fixed on Darcy. “Hi.”

“Hey.” Darcy offered a little wave. She wanted to go over and hug him, but she wasn't sure if that was the best move in front of his mom. Sure they were childhood friends, but with the way Mrs. Kent was watching them...

Mrs. Kent looked between them for another second, and _something_ flickered behind her eyes. If Darcy didn't know better, she would have said it was _mischief_. “I haven't taken Baxter out for his walk yet today, why don't you two take him out for me?”

Baxter, the collie-mix mutt, perked up at the mention of a walk. He was on his feet immediately, bouncing around the kitchen and generally getting underfoot. There was really no choice, then. Darcy got her coat and scarf back on, and they trooped outside.

It had snowed a little bit the night before and while someone had cleared away the front path, they headed out over the light dusting of snow into the field, Baxter bounding around them.

Darcy stooped and scooped up a handful of snow, forming it into a ball. She threw it for Baxter, who chased it down and came back with it in his mouth, tail wagging. “Does your mom know we see each other for work or whatever? And, like, I know who you are?”

He shrugged, his broad shoulders moving under his jacket. It was a little too light for a proper winter coat, but she knew that the cold wouldn't bother him. “I don't really tell her about the bureaucratic parts of what I do. She knows that I've met up with you, though.”

Darcy glanced over her shoulder back at the house. “I think she's shipping us pretty hard.”

Clark had a great smile, and he turned it on her now as he stepped closer to her. His arm came around her shoulders and he pulled her gently against his side. “She has since we were kids. I got an earful when Joey ended up taking you to prom instead of me.”

Darcy rolled her eyes, letting her head rest against the side of his chest. “Oh my god, my mom was the worst about prom.” She paused a second, then made a face. “Joey dumped me when that picture of you and I dancing was in the yearbook, you know. I totally blamed you.”

“Is that why you wouldn't talk to me that summer?” He sounded surprised, like he actually hadn't known that.

“Well, it's not like you really stuck around long after school was out, anyway.” She made a face again. “Not like I blame you, really.” She'd lost her dad, too. Car accident, when she was a kid. “Are you guys coming over for Christmas dinner?”

“I don't know. Probably.”

“So...” She took in a deep breath and let out a long sigh. “Are we going to tell them?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're doomed when your moms ship you...


	27. Darcy/Clay, fireplace

 “Why am _I_ doing this again?” Darcy looked over her shoulder from where she was kneeling in front of the fireplace, arranging the kindling to get a fire going. “Didn't you actually have to do this in your training at some point?” She stared up at Frank for a second, eyes narrowing. “Were you staring at my ass?”

He gave her one of his easy smile, his long fingers deftly untangling the long string of Christmas lights. “That's classified.”

Her eyebrows lifted faintly. “Which part?”

He chuckled a little. “Both.”

“Right.” Shaking her head, Darcy turned back towards the brick fireplace and made one final adjustment to the newspaper that was crumpled up under a couple of small, dry sticks. She lit the long wooden match and slowly brought it towards the paper until the whole thing just caught fire. It took a bit to get the fire built up, but at last there was a decent blaze going.

She stood up and turned around. He'd finished with the first strand of lights and had started on the second. And he'd _definitely_ been watching her ass. “Okay, but you're making tomorrow's fire.” Her hands came up to rest on her hips. “Shirtless.”

He chuckled again and set the half-untangled string of lights on the cushion of the chair whose arm he was perched on. He stood up and moved towards her, arms going around her waist to pull her against him. “I don't want to get burned if it sparks.”

“We'll see.” She rested her cheek against his chest, listening to the soft beat of his heart. There'd been a couple of questions that had been bothering her lately, but she was a little hesitant to ask, just because she wasn't sure of the answers. “Are you going to be home for Christmas?” She didn't want to hear _no_.

“Should be.” He sounded just as relieved as she felt.

She smiled at that, letting her eyes close as she nestled against the front of his white shirt. “Good. 'Cause as much fun as Halloween was...” His chest jerked under her with his snicker, and one hand drifted down to rest squarely over her ass. Something else was nagging at her mind. She took a deep breath. “We should invite the guys, though.” Well, that wasn't quite it, but still something she'd been thinking about. “JJ and Cougar, at least.” Pooch and Jolene probably wouldn't want to come all the way out to their house with the baby. “Have a nice dinner.”

“Hmm.” The sound rumbled up from deep in his chest. “I'm not giving up our bed for them.”

Darcy grinned. “That's fine. I still have an office, we can throw down an air mattress for them or something.” She paused for a second. “Or we can snuggle together on the couch again.”

“Hmm.” Frank sounded like he was actually considering it. Because while they kinda both had a hard time fitting on the couch together, it sure prompted a whole lot of close physical contact. “I don't think so. There's a lot more privacy in our room.”

“Okay. I'll text JJ tonight.” She pulled away, glancing over at the fireplace to make sure it was doing okay before going for the string of lights that was coiled neatly on the floor. She had to try again, better to just get it all out in the open. “So, theoretically...” She took a deep breath as she straightened back up, looking at where he was moving back to his seat on the arm of the chair. “How do you feel about children?”

He shrugged. “They're okay. They can be pretty cute.”

“Uh huh.” She watched him as he settled back down in his seat and picked up the other string of lights. “We didn't really talk about kids before we got married.”

“No, we didn't.” The lights were rested against his thigh. “Didn't really cross my mind at the time. I dunno, I guess if you want kids we can maybe look at trying.” He grinned again. “I hear that part's pretty fun.”

“Okay...” Darcy rolled the base of one of the lights back and forth between her finger and thumb. “So what if hypothetically I was already pregnant?” She winced a little. That wasn't exactly the smoothest thing she'd ever said.

The smile fell off his face and he stared at her for a second. “You're... You're serious.”

“Yeah. Apparently. Speaking of Halloween...” Her eyes widened for a second for emphasis.

His eyes dropped to her as-yet-unchanged waistline. “That's a surprise.” His gaze came back up to her face, searching like he was trying to tell if she was joking or not.

She definitely wasn't joking. She waved her free hand at him, giving him a little jazz hand. “Surprise!”

Slowly a grin moved across his face, and his gaze dropped to her stomach again. He got up, leaving the lights on the chair, and came over to give her another big hug. “We're having a baby.” He sounded happy, too. Like, genuinely pleased at the news.

She slipped her arms around his waist. “So is that a _yes_ on the shirtless fire-building tomorrow?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Funny thing about unprotected sex...


	28. Jane/Bucky/Steve, cookies

“What's all that?”

Jane looked back from the large stack of cookie tins she could barely see around, turning to look over her shoulder as Steve rushed towards her. “It's from Darcy. She's nesting or something, but we've just been given approximately a year's supply of cookies. Well...” She paused to think. “Maybe not with how much you two eat.”

He started plucking cookie tins from her, their contents rattling a little as he organized them in his own sturdy grip. He had a much easier time with it than she did, that was for sure. They walked together down the hall towards their apartment, and Jane pulled open the door for him.

Steve preceded her into their home. “Don't tell me Stark turned Jane into a bunch of cookie tins,” came from within. “'Cause I don't wanna kill him, but I guess I'll have to if Jane's a bunch of cookie tins.”

“I'm back here.” She followed Steve inside, pushing the door shut behind her. “Those are from Darcy.”

James came into view as Steve went around the corner to the kitchen. He moved towards Jane, his arm already coming out to slide around her waist and pull her against his side. “What's the occasion?”

She snuggled in against him, resting the side of her head against the upper part of his chest. “I think she's nesting, and she was worried that we wouldn't have any Christmas cookies.”

“Well, at this rate now maybe they'll last until Christmas.” He stared into the kitchen where Steve was making a neat stack on the counter. “Maybe. Stevie eats cookies like it's goin' out of style.”

A snort came from the kitchen. “Oh, yeah. I'm the only one of course.” He emerged from the kitchen, hands settling on his hips as he looked at the other man. “Any word on dinner?”

James took an exaggerated look around Steve into the kitchen, pulling Jane along with him as he leaned heavily to the side. “I dunno, from the looks of it I'd say cookies.”

Steve smirked. “I'm gonna need a little more protein than that.”

James straightened up, and Jane grabbed at his shirt so she stayed more or less in place. His arm tightened around her too, that probably helped. “I've got somethin' you can have.” He gave Steve his own smirk.

“But what about me?” Jane asked, only realizing after she'd said it that James _wouldn't_ take it as referring to dinner.

His arm tightened around her waist. “Plenty to go around.”

She slipped away from him and headed around Steve to go into the kitchen herself, but a pair of large hands snagged her waist and pulled her back. “Nope,” Steve said, arms settling around her as he pressed her back against him. “You're not allowed in there anymore.”

There was a running joke that she wasn't allowed to cook anymore because she'd accidentally smoked them out of the apartment one night when she'd forgotten about the rice sitting on the burner. “Okay, it happened _once_ and it was because I got distracted. I managed perfectly fine before I moved in with you guys.” She twisted her head back so she could look up into Steve's face. “I had help being distracted, too.”

He just grinned at her.

“I dunno, I was thinking pizza or somethin'.” James shrugged. “Darcy's got that about-to-pop look going on, and I didn't want something to be left half-cooked and forgotten while we zipped off to the hospital.”

“No, that's a good idea.” Jane nodded. She let her head fall back to rest against Steve's chest. “I'll let you guys sort out the pizza. Just remember, no-”

“Anchovies?” James grinned and he took the couple steps that separated them, leaning down to give her a kiss. “I know.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This COULD come after the Darcy/Sam fic in this collection about cookies, but it doesn't have to.


	29. Darcy/Bucky, icicle

“You grew up in the city, didn't you?” Darcy looked over at the dark-haired man who was walking easily through the snow beside her. The storm had finally stopped, and they were getting some exercise after being cooped up in the cabin for a while. Well, a different kind of exercise, anyway.

“Yeah, Brooklyn.” He looked back for a second before going back to scanning the area around them. “Why?”

“I'm pretty sure you didn't do this when you were a kid, then. Here.” She walked over to the bare, low-hanging branch of a tree and pulled off an icicle that was dangling from it. She gave it a lick, then handed it over to James.

He took it from her, giving it a dubious look. “Ain't we supposed to be worrying about particulates and bacteria and shit like that?”

She gave him a look. “Isn't your immune system to be almost as beefy as your shoulders?”

He smirked at that and licked the long cone of ice. “Doesn't taste like anything.”

“Okay, if it did, then _I_ would be worried. No, it's just... Kinda like a popsicle or whatever. I'm willing to bet you've never had snow cream, either.” He had a blank look on his face and shook his head. “We probably don't have the stuff we need at the cabin, but I'll have a look when we get back.”

He looked at her for a long moment, but he took another lick at the icicle. “You did all this stuff when you were growing up?”

“Sure. We got a lot of snow some years.” Darcy made a face. “It's not quite the same in the city. I mean, it looks pretty when it falls, and everything gets that awesome snowy hush to it, but then the next day it's all brown and gross.” She wondered if they'd even had any snow back at the tower while she was out here with James.

“We should head back.” He gestured with his thumb back towards the cabin.

She sighed. “Yeah, I guess.” There'd been no word on a new time they'd be picked up before they'd left on their walk. She hadn't brought her phone with her, but she was willing to bet that there'd be a message for her when they got back to the cabin, and they should probably tidy up and stuff.

They turned around and started back to the cabin, stepping in the track they'd made on the way out there. It took a bit of effort to walk through the fresh snow, even at a leisurely pace, and Darcy took a second to sit down and check her phone when they got back inside.

Sure enough, there was a message from Maria with a new time that they could expect 'extraction.' “We've got about six hours.” She looked up to where James was peeling off his outer couple layers. He'd left the icicle outside, probably a good call on his part. “Enough time to do the dishes, put a load of laundry on, maybe see about that snow cream.”

He just kept pulling off clothes, and Darcy couldn't help but stare a little as his certainly beefy shoulders were bared. Yeah, she still wasn't used to seeing all of that all up close and personal. Not that he was up close just at the moment, but he looked like he was going to change _that_ in just a second.

Sure enough he started moving towards her. He plucked the phone gently from her hand and put it on one of the side tables that bracketed the couch. “Enough time for somethin' else, too.” He crouched down in front of her.

A half-hearted protest died before it really made it anywhere. Because she was enjoying this part of being stranded with James a whole lot, and she wasn't entirely sure the more physical aspect of the way they related to each other would last once they got back to the tower.

“Oh yeah?” She reached up and clasped her hands loosely behind the back of his neck. “Are you talking about making some stew in the crock pot?”

“No...” His hands slid up the outsides of her legs, up over her thighs. “But I was lickin' that thing outside and it gave me an idea.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It gave him an idea. You know, WINK.
> 
> OH. This definitely follows after the snowed in with this pairing.


	30. Darcy/Gambit/Tony, snowed in

Tony leaned an arm against the wall that surrounded the window as he peered out into the darkness. “It is really coming down out there.”

“Yeah.” Darcy sighed from her seat on the couch. She'd looked out the window on her way back from the kitchen with a fresh cup of coffee, and it had been basically completely white. Well, gray. Because nighttime.

Remy was sitting at the table, she could hear the cards flutter together as he shuffled them effortlessly in his hands. “We are here for the night, _non_?”

“Well, _you_ might be.” Tony turned away from the window and looked between the two of them, his hands on his hips. “I can just fly up above the clouds in the suit and get out of here.”

Darcy's eyes widened as she looked up at him, and she shook her head, maybe a touch frantically. “Oh no. No, if we're gonna be stuck here then we should _all_ be stuck here. Besides, you're the only one who can fly the quinjet.” Because _someone_ wouldn't teach her. Yeah, they'd be having some words about that when they got back.

One corner of Tony's mouth lifted into a smirk, and he folded his arms across his chest as he looked down at her. “Why's that? There a particular reason you don't want me to go?”

She narrowed her eyes in a glare. He knew _exactly_ why she didn't want him to go, he'd been laughing about it all day long. Remy had been using his rather considerable charm on her for most of the day, and if Tony left she was more-than-likely going to find herself naked and wrapped around a Cajun very shortly thereafter. “Yeah. The quinjet thing.” There was one bedroom in this stupid chalet, and with Tony there she totally had the excuse of sharing it with him.

It wasn't like she had a problem with Remy, far from it. She was just worried that it would sort of lead to a habit. A bad habit with glowing red eyes. It didn't help that Tony was apparently all for it.

“Uh huh. I'm gonna go make sure that we're set on power for the night. You two...” He looked back and forth between them, his smirk growing. “Well, don't go anywhere.”

“If you fly out of here I'm going to actually kill you.” She watched him step into the suit before he opened the door and stepped outside.

The appearance of Remy's long coat in the corner of her eye actually made her jump. She hadn't heard him get up or move across the room, and now he was lowering himself onto the couch beside her. “Jesus fucking Christ! Give me a heart attack!”

“Apologies, _cher_. What can I do to make it up to you?” It was a perfectly innocent question in a perfectly innocent tone of voice, but there was just something about it that made her want to crawl across the couch and do something totally inappropriate like pulling that shirt out of the way and licking her way along his abs.

Wow, that was pretty specific.

“Uh, I'm good. Thanks, though.” She unfolded her legs from underneath her and put her feet on the floor to get up. Dinner? Midnight snack? Whatever. Puttering around in the little kitchenette would give her something entirely harmless to do.

His eyebrows came together a little. “Have I offended you in some way?”

“Uh, no.” Darcy shook her head, sitting back down for a second to look at him. “Not at all. Why?”

“All day, you seem eager to be away from me.” Confusion touched his face, and Darcy felt like pretty much the world's biggest bitch.

She let out a long sigh and shook her head. “No, Remy. I'm sorry, it's got nothing to do with you.” Well, that wasn't _entirely_ true. “It's just...”

The door opened and Tony's voice came very clearly through the speaker on the suit. “She's hot for you, Ace.” The face mask slid back to reveal him giving Remy a very commiserating look. “Went through the same thing with me until someone... Who was it?” He looked at Darcy for help, and she just glared at him and kept her mouth shut. He waved his hand dismissively. “Someone. Someone told me to make the first move as unsubtly as I could.”

“Is that so?” The look on Remy's face had changed entirely, and Darcy swore she stopped breathing for a second.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG this prompt!!!!!!  
> Which finally has a smutty, smutty conclusion [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4021438/chapters/15111898)!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [eat, drink, and be merry](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5420969) by [basta_wwoqd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/basta_wwoqd/pseuds/basta_wwoqd)




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